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Posts Tagged ‘spotlight’
 

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Allan's Perspective

U.S. Republicans are a bunch of hypocrites!

Posted March 26, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Remember the big kerfuffle because the Republicans in the States claimed Obama was ineligible to be President because he was born in Nigeria, or Slobvania, or somewhere else ……… anywhere else except the United States? (Wrong, and that asshole Donald Trump is STILL going on about that!) Well kids, apparently what’s good for the goose is […]

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Allan's Perspective

The Naked Truth!

Posted March 25, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A Charlotte man who has continually irritated his neighbors by standing naked in the front door of his home has exposed a state law that local prosecutors want to change. North Carolina law says a person can’t expose himself in a place where the public has access. But CMPD spokesman Rob Tufano told The Charlotte […]

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Allan's Perspective

Safari!

Posted March 24, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A Husband and wife were on safari: Wife- If that cheetah catches that deer and kills it, I’m going to be absolutely heartbroken. Husband- that’s nature. Don’t go against it. Cheetah has to kill it to eat and survive. Wife- do something. Husband – what can I do? Wife- if the deer dies I’ll call […]

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MAYOR REFUSES TO REMOVE PORK FROM SCHOOL MENU!

Posted March 23, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Let’s hear it for a Quebec mayor… Or as the commercial promoting pork says “put some pork on your fork” Muslim parents demanded the abolition of pork in all the school canteens of a Montreal suburb. The mayor of the Montreal suburb of Dorval refused, and the town clerk sent a note to all parents to explain why… ! […]

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Allan's Perspective

Mile high, or just plain high?

Posted March 23, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Here’s someone who tried to join the “mile high” club as a solo act! A British woman was arrested on suspicion of being drunk in an aircraft after she stripped off on a flight from Jamaica – and started performing a solo SEX ACT. (Masturbation!) The 46-year-old woman from south-west London was nicked when her […]

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Allan's Perspective

Sunday Morning Funnies # 2645

Posted March 22, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

The man told his doctor that he wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, “Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.” “Well, in plain English,” the doctor replied, “you’re just lazy.” […]

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Allan's Perspective

Saturday Morning Confusion #27,680

Posted March 21, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Well folks, are ya confused enough yet? Then read on with these files from the Naked News Department: ————————————— Authorities in Minnesota say three would-be robbers picked the wrong time to pocket-dial 911. Blue Earth Sheriff’s Capt. Rich Murry says a dispatcher took the call early Thursday morning and heard two voices on the other […]

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Allan's Perspective

Tit for Tat!

Posted March 20, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

It all started when a woman got out of line inside an Athens convenience store, according to police. The 28-year-old man behind her moved up to the counter to pay for his purchases, he told police. But when the woman came back, she was irritated the man had moved ahead of her, and she let […]

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Allan's Perspective

Answer to Muslim Radicals!

Posted March 19, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Dear Readers: This is one of the best answers I have heard regarding the problem of Muslim radicals in the Western world. This woman not only makes a lot of sense, but raises some interesting questions as well! Cemetary of British war victims destroyed by Muslim Mob (Notice the Imam standing on a wall and […]

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Allan's Perspective

Winter is still here!

Posted March 18, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Just because it’s the middle of March doesn’t mean that winter is over, kids! There was a 50 car pile-up on the 401 around Bellville overnight and Nova Scotia has been shut down after they got their second snowstorm in as many days. Meanwhile, A Newfoundland woman and her two children who spent 21 hours […]

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Allan's Perspective

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Posted March 17, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

May the luck of the Irish be with you! ———————————————— Facebook has created a new rule book that tells users the sort of content they can and can’t post on the site, including a ban on images of buttocks. The social network has been criticized in the past for inconsistency when it comes to user-published […]

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Allan's Perspective

Monday Madness!

Posted March 16, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

We’ve all heard of the tortoise and the hare……. right? Well here’s a new one for ya bunky! ——————————————————– Look at this dumb turtle chasing after a dog like he’s got a real shot at catching up; he’ll never catch up. And yet even so, onward he plods, ne’er to abandon his reptilian hope—to be […]

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Allan's Perspective

You are what you eat!

Posted March 15, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Coffee, first it was good for ya, then it was bad for ya, and now it’s good for ya again! Seems that’s not the only thing professionals have been lying to us about according to Margaret Wente of the Globe and Mail! ————————————- Bacon and eggs for breakfast is a guilty pleasure in our household. […]

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Allan's Perspective

Sunday Morning Funnies # 53

Posted March 15, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A New Brunswick man was stopped by a game warden in Northern NB recently, with two ice chests full of live fish in water, leaving a river well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, “Do you have a license to catch those fish?” “Naw, my friend, I ain’t got no license. […]

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Allan's Perspective

Saturday Morning Confusion about Pi.

Posted March 14, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Folks we have a story from Alabama that, whether it’s true or not, sounds like something they would do down there: — NASA engineers and mathematicians in this high-tech city are stunned and infuriated after the Alabama state legistature narrowly passed a law yesterday redefining pi, a mathematical constant used in the aerospace industry. The […]

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Allan's Perspective

Big Ass Balloon

Posted March 13, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Big Ass Balloon Seen recently at the Indianola balloon rallies……………………Up, up, and away! ——————————————- So, you’re having a bad day. Then you step outside of your house and look up into the beautiful blue sky. And see this !!!!! All of a sudden, that smile comes back to your face and you say to yourself: […]

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Allan's Perspective

When I was a kid!

Posted March 12, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Remember when your parents told you they had to walk ten miles to get to school when they were kids? Well, it’s not that bad in New Brunswick, but it’s bad enough! Parents in New Brunswick say their primary school-aged children are being left out in the cold by a provincial policy that restricts school […]

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Allan's Perspective

The naked and the brave!

Posted March 11, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A 32-year-old woman told police in Florida she got naked and sat outside a Dunkin’ Donuts as a dare. The Palm Beach Post (http://pbpo.st/1EQc0sF) reports Shakara Monik Martin was arrested Sunday in Greenacres near West Palm Beach. According to a police report, Martin told authorities the dare was part of a pledge to a dance […]

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Allan's Perspective

Civilized?

Posted March 11, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A sign welcomes visitors to Taber, Alta., in this April 23, 2009 file photo. (Jeff McIntosh / THE CANADIAN PRESS) Well, well, some places on this planet are getting a little civilized folks! TABER, Alta. — Do not disturb. Or yell, or swear or spit on the sidewalk. The southern Alberta town of Taber, population […]

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Allan's Perspective

Why?

Posted March 10, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Look folks, I can understand getting junk mail ………… but why in the hell do they keep sending me stuff that’s in CHINESE? – – – – After all, it’s all Greek to me!

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Allan's Perspective

It’s a dog’s life!

Posted March 10, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Dog quarantined after attack leaves man dead: Getty Images Two people in Wheeling, West Virginia, are dead and a dog is locked away at an animal control facility, following a bizarre incident which took place inside of a residence on Sunday, reported Monday’s publication of the Daily Mail. Late Sunday evening, local authorities were called […]

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Allan's Perspective

Heart Attack? Save a life!

Posted March 9, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Please read this:- Let’s say it’s 7:25 PM and you’re going home (alone of course) after an unusually hard day on the job. You’re really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up in to your jaw. You are only […]

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Addictions

“Jeunesse,” miracle cure?

Posted March 9, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Dear Readers: As you may know I just spent ten weeks in the hospital, four of them on life support, for complications from the flu! My recover has been sporadic until I tried this product from “Jeunesse.” They call it “Reserve” and it is a combination of many natural occurring substances that slow aging and […]

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Allan's Perspective

Ontario

Posted March 9, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Here’s another one from Wayne! An Israeli doctor says: “In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man’s testicles, put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work.” The German doctor says: “That’s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, […]

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Allan's Perspective

Sunday Morning Funnies # 59

Posted March 8, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check- out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked sweetly, “So which six items would you like to buy?” (Wouldn’t it be great […]

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Cops out of control, shoot pony!

Posted March 7, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

A beloved elderly pony that escaped from his barn stall and went for a stroll one night was shot dead by police for no good reason, according to a furious family in Oregon. A neighbor called police after she found Gir, a 30-year-old American Miniature Horse, lying in her yard in Clackamas County last month. […]

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Allan's Perspective

I lost it!

Posted March 6, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

You know that little bar that holds the toilet paper on the holder? I lost it! Don’t ask me how because I have no idea. (Besides, if I knew, it wouldn’t be lost now, would it!) ————————————– Well, A Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, And finally they got married, and […]

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Allan's Perspective

Is sex education for kindergarten next?

Posted March 4, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

The sex education courses that are taught in public schools here are over twenty years old, so the Wynne Liberals are introducing a new school curriculum for pre-teens that includes such things as masturbation, sex change and gender identity, and a whole lot of other issues that has parents up in arms about what is […]

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Allan's Perspective

Wednesday Mayhem!

Posted March 4, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Seems like old people are in the news this week! The world’s oldest person says 117 years doesn’t seem like such a long time. Misao Okawa, the daughter of a kimono maker, made the comment Wednesday, at a celebration a day before her 117th birthday. Appropriately, she was wearing a pink kimono decorated with cherry […]

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Allan's Perspective

Couple married forever!!!!!

Posted March 3, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

I still can’t get into any long posts about me, or the world in general, but this caught my eye and I thought you mind find it interesting! “In this photo taken on Thursday, Feb. 26, 2015, Spring Valley resident Duranord Veillard and his wife Jeanne Veillard are photographed in Spring Valley, N.Y. Duranord Veillard […]

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Allan's Perspective

On the slow road to recovery.

Posted March 2, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

I can honestly say that I have never gone through anything like this in my life. Oh, I’ve been incredibly hung over, sick with all sorts of stuff, had hips replaced and much more, but nothing compares to dying a few times and being on life support for over a month. I guess the only […]

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How I spent my winter vacation!

Posted February 28, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

(Son-of-a-bitch, I DID die……………… read on:) The last thing I remember on the morning of January 6th is my wife saying: You have got to go to the doctor NOW! Apparently I went, and the doctor immediately called an ambulance and put me into intensive care. (My blood oxygen level was 55% vs. the normal 95%. […]

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Allan's Perspective

The flu is no fun at all!

Posted January 5, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Every one around here has had the flu over the past month, and it’s a nasty, nasty one folks! I kept saying that I wouldn’t get it, and almost proved myself right until New Years eve! Since then I have been in a living hell, and even lost my voice earlier today! Needless to say, […]

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Sunday Morning Funnies # 541

Posted January 4, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

1- I’m not saying let’s go kill all the stupid people. I’m just saying let’s remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out. 2- I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now. 3- I can tell a lot about a woman’s mood […]

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Saturday Morning Confusion about Cosby!

Posted January 3, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Dear Readers: I feel I must comment on this issue one more time, and then I will leave it alone! The first question is: did he do all that stuff he is being accused of? Probably not! Did he do some of the stuff he is being accused of? PROBABLY! But that doesn’t matter kids, […]

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Allan's Perspective

Another Year!

Posted January 2, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

Where did the year go? Suddenly it is January…….again, and we realize that with giant strides, we started last January and within a blink of an eye, 2014 is on its back! A big “Thank You” to each and everyone of you, for the impact you had on my life this year. Especially for all […]

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Happy New Year!

Posted January 1, 2015 by Allan W Janssen

White Rock, B.C. will hold its annual polar bear plunge in the ocean again today. These slightly deranged revelers are shown here during last years dip, and most of them will be back again today for another try at hypothermia! ——————————————— Since last night was New Years Eve you should know that a lot of […]

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Allan's Perspective

Bill!

Posted December 31, 2014 by Allan W Janssen

Guest post: By Kathleen Parker, Opinion Writer, Washington Post. By now, most Americans probably have formed an opinion about what comedian Bill Cosby did or didn’t do sexually to or with at least 16 women beginning in the 1960s. According to several women who have accused him of sexual predations, Cosby’s usual modus operandi was […]

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Look, up in the air ……!

Posted December 31, 2014 by Allan W Janssen

Dear Readers: I think it’s time for a bit of “debunking” again! We occasionally like to expose all the conspiracy theorists for what they are ………….., a bunch of hysterical, paranoid and misguided zealots who see shadows at every turn. This latest story concerns UFO’s and little green men! (The most famous couple, as far […]

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Another Day!

Posted December 30, 2014 by Allan W Janssen

Dear Readers: Contrary to rumours floating around the Internet this morning, Hugh Hefner did not die on the weekend! The long time Playboy is in fine health, but we are sad to report that it was his “dick” that died! After having an erection for the last sixty years, his ‘willy’ finally gave out by […]

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